Separation and Loss

Q: 

A: 

Threats of suicide should always be taken seriously and an actual attempt is an even more alarming sign that all is not well. Your daughter was very young to have lost her mother from your family, and it’s possible that on top of her more obvious problems of overactivity she may also suffer childhood depression.

She really needs counselling to help her come to terms with the instability of her life and trauma she may have suffered. I would also suggest she be allowed to have a say in where she wants to live. Even though you may not be able to provide her with as much material “stuff,” you may be the only link to stability she has. Should you be able to gain custody of your daughter again, I would suggest you contact your nearest child mental health service.

I can understand that while you’re very angry with your ex-wife for what has happened, at this stage that must take second place to the more urgent problem of helping your little girl. Whether this happens here or in New Zealand is not an issue.

I have no legal expertise to offer in this case, so I would suggest you contact Legal Aid as a first step. They will offer you a limited number of free sessions, which may be enough to help you decide what you can do about getting your daughter back.