Lonely to despair

Lonely to despair

A relationship break up can lead to depression and even suicidal thoughts. Getting help is imperative and medication should be approached holistically.

A relationship break up can lead to depression and even suicidal thoughts. Getting help is imperative and medication should be approached holistically.

Deanna PitchfordMar 20, 2023, 12:40 AM

Q: I am 35 years old and work as an engineer. My girlfriend recently left me. I've been very lonely, can't sleep, and I'm very irritable. The worst thing is that I'm thinking about driving my car into a bridge or pole and ending it all. My doctor has given me some antidepressants, but they don't seem to be working. I haven't been to church much in the past six months and no-one seems to have noticed. I haven't had a phone call or a visit from anyone. This also makes me angry and sometimes I wonder if anybody cares.

A: It is never an easy experience when people let us down. The thoughts of “ending it all” indicate you've reached a level of desperation and despair that is dangerous. If you find yourself thinking such thoughts, seek help immediately.

You need to tell someone how you feel.

It is important you do not ignore these thoughts.

Your symptoms are all signs of depression.

It is good you've seen your doctor.

Putting up one's hand for help is the first step on the road to recovery. Depression is often seen as a sign of weakness but I am glad to see that you seem to have a more realistic view of this common human problem.

It takes time for antidepressants to become fully effective, but if you've been on the tablets for more than a month and can't see improvement, it may be that the dosage is too low or that another kind would be better. Discuss this with your doctor and persist until you find something that works. The value of this type of medication lies in its ability to help you out of that rut of despair by giving you energy to work on the reasons for your depression.

Medication should be part of a holistic treatment package. There is compelling research to suggest that depression is as much a problem of brain chemicals as it is of negative thinking patterns. Find a counsellor who specialises in depression who can help you identify and change those thought patterns that are counterproductive in your life. This process, together with medication, promises the most effective and long-lasting answer to depression.

There are also other things you can do to help yourself and that is to find some form of exercise you enjoy—this raises the levels of “feel-good” chemicals in the brain and will help to lift your mood. This may also help you sleep better.

There is hope for all who suffer from depression and I would encourage you to explore all the avenues of help that you can. Don't give up on the wonderful gift of life you have been given.

More Articles

Meaning of a soul

Dec 9, 2024

Meaning of a soul

A soul, according to the Bible, is the complete person—body and breath of life combined—not a separate immortal entity. Learn how this truth shapes life, death, and eternity.

Did the War in Heaven happen before Creation

Dec 5, 2024

Did the War in Heaven happen before Creation

Explore the origins of the war in heaven, its impact on creation, and its resolution at the cross. Discover how this cosmic conflict reveals God’s justice, love, and ultimate victory over sin.

Is Jesus Michael the Archangel?

Dec 4, 2024

Is Jesus Michael the Archangel?

Explore the identity of Michael the Archangel in this in-depth article. Discover key biblical evidence, insights from Protestant commentators, and perspectives on whether Michael is a title for Jesus Christ or a distinct angelic being.

Remember the Sabbath, Keep It Holy

Nov 25, 2024

Remember the Sabbath, Keep It Holy

This holiness is not something we bestow upon the day; rather, it is a sanctity declared by God Himself. Just as certain objects, places, and even people were consecrated for divine purposes in Scripture, the Sabbath is a segment of time that God has designated as sacred.

Is the Sabbath Saturday or Sunday?

Nov 21, 2024

Is the Sabbath Saturday or Sunday?

The Sabbath, biblically established as Saturday, remains unchanged in Scripture as the seventh day of rest and worship. Sunday observance arose centuries later due to cultural, political, and religious influences, not a biblical mandate. Discover the historical and theological truths behind this important question.