We have to work for our connectedness . . . you don’t just pick a human, decide you want to be friends and wake up the next day with an unbreakable bond.
Ellesha KnightMar 20, 2023, 12:41 AM
As youth, we’re constantly being told, “These are the best years of your life!” And so far it’s probably proving to be pretty accurate. We’re stepping out into the world, discovering our independence, our freedom . . . and at the same time we’re bumping into a whole lot of stress, responsibility and “grown-up” stuff that we’ve only seen in movies. We’re having the time of our lives, while secretly flailing around like fish on land wondering how everybody else seems to have it all together.
What I love the most about this situation is that most of the time, we’re all feeling the same. We all want to be accepted, to be part of the “in crowd”, yet we often see ourselves as the only one who isn’t! How come? Well to be honest, when we’re overloaded with Instagram photos, Facebook tags and huge friend counts, how can we not feel inadequate? At the same time as being happy for our friends and their adventure-filled lives, human nature kicks in and we start to compare ourselves, often leaving us feeling restless and disconnected.
When we focus on what other people have, or how other people live, we can become dissatisfied with the way our own lives are going and we begin to withdraw. A life lesson we all figure out pretty quickly is that nothing worth having in life comes free. We have to work for our money, save for our toys and clean up our own mess. In exactly the same way, we have to work for our connectedness. For example, the friend-making process doesn’t happen overnight. You don’t just pick a human, decide you want to be friends and wake up the next day with an unbreakable bond. It needs to be worked for! And as a self-confessed introvert, I can safely say that this can be hard.
Ellesha Knight lives in Melbourne, Victoria, and is studying a Masters of Occupational Therapy at La Trobe University.
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